Deb Brandon: Living in Radiant Color

Bereft

A memory slammed into me and with it overwhelming despair as I felt my first night in inpatient rehab. I felt desperately lonely, as if I was in the middle of a desolate landscape with no one else in sight. Mum had left for the hotel earlier, shortly after Cindy arrived for a visit. And … Read more

Jolt

Accompanied by a bad headache, this morning’s vertigo was worse than usual, and it didn’t abate by the time I sat down to breakfast. I had to move my head carefully as I ate to minimize the effect. After I finished, I sat for a while longer, hoping that my brain would settle and I’d … Read more

Self-Doubt

The first time I stopped by the math department after the brain surgeries, a total stranger greeted me enthusiastically in the hallway. “Ciao, Deborah! It’s so good to see you!” What a lovely Italian accent! Clearly another visiting mathematician. I beamed. “Hi! When did you get here? How long are you staying?” As the friendly … Read more

Twos

“I’ve hired Irina, Chad, and… ummm…” I shook my head. “Ummm… sorry, it’s not coming.” A few minutes later, as we were wrapping up, the third name popped up to the surface. “Alexei!” I grinned. “So that’s Alexei, Chad, and…” Tom had to fill in the third name. I have trouble with all types of … Read more

Chance Meeting

“Dvorah?!” I turned to identify the source of the questioning exclamation. I immediately recognized the face attached to the unfamiliar voice—Ze’ev. Deep down inside, I didn’t feel the need to confirm his identity, but a niggling voice in my mind did. I searched the crowd milling about us to place him within a familiar context, … Read more

Gaps

Someone uploaded a photo of three high school kids. It’s clearly from a school trip. I recognized myself. I looked lost. I remembered David. But there between David and me, his arms around us was someone whose face I only knew that I should remember. David, Uri, and myself. The tag said “Uri D’Angeli R.I.P.” … Read more