Deb Brandon: Living in Radiant Color

10 Things I Don’t Like (in no particular order)

I’ve never really like crowds. But now, unlike in my pre-bloody brain life, I can’t tolerate them. I can’t process high volumes of information in a timely fashion. All data comes in with equal value, whether it is a loud shriek or a soft murmur. All colors seem garish, blinding, and all tactile input is harsh to the touch. Everything is a blur, without shape, chaotic. I can’t make order out of the chaos. I have nothing to anchor me and my incoherent thoughts. My brain lacks the ability to file information away under recognizable labels.

10 Things I Especially Like (In No Particular Order)

Gus’s a funny little thing, a mutt, smarter that I could have imagined. He teases me, changing the rules of games as we play, laughing at me from the top of the steep hill in my back yard, squeaking his toy as he tries to tempt me to clamber up the slippery slope to wrestle the toy away from him.

Expectations

On Fridays after work, I feel like a zombie with a headache. I walk in the door, sit at the dining room table, and stare into space for a good thirty minutes, often more. I then struggle to make my way upstairs. After a relatively easy week, when the headache isn’t terrible, once in my … Read more

Morning Ritual

I evaluated my headache—a couple of pieces of candied ginger and some protein? Or more? The shower will probably help, and a decent chug of water. I close my eyes, listening to my body. Nope.  I’m going to need more than that. Some Aleve. At least two. Hopefully that’ll keep it in check, to the … Read more

Woohoo!

I posted on Facebook: “No headache today! Whoohoo!” It’s the second day since the semester began, a month and a half ago, that I was headache free. Yes, the day isn’t over yet, but from past experience I know that there’s a decent chance that I will be fine the rest of the day. As … Read more