10 Things I Don’t Like (in no particular order)

August 8, 2022July 24, 2021

I’ve never really like crowds. But now, unlike in my pre-bloody brain life, I can’t tolerate them. I can’t process high volumes of information in a timely fashion. All data comes in with equal value, whether it is a loud shriek or a soft murmur. All colors seem garish, blinding, and all tactile input is harsh to the touch. Everything is a blur, without shape, chaotic. I can’t make order out of the chaos. I have nothing to anchor me and my incoherent thoughts. My brain lacks the ability to file information away under recognizable labels.

Orientation

August 1, 2019November 10, 2016

Without warning, the universe exploded. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t hear. My entire world had become pain. The pain had no orientation—it had no location, no direction, no measure. It defied words. I was pain. Another explosion, and the pain intensified. But now, there was orientation, location: it was in my head, and it was … Read more

Hope?

August 1, 2019September 6, 2016

I woke up in the middle of the night with a horrific headache. Every motion, however slight, set off a new explosion of pain, taking the headache to another level. Though I knew that chances were that nothing would help, I downed ginger and turmeric caplets. Perhaps it would at least take the edge off. … Read more

Stress and De-Stress

August 1, 2019May 20, 2016

“I assume you’ve been having de-stress migraines?” I was surprised for a split second—how would she know? Then I remembered—Sara, a friend, also suffers from frequent horrific migraines. She knew what it was like. On Wednesday, I had to say no Irina’s invitation to go out to dinner. Earlier that day, I wondered whether I … Read more