I’ve never really like crowds. But now, unlike in my pre-bloody brain life, I can’t tolerate them. I can’t process high volumes of information in a timely fashion. All data comes in with equal value, whether it is a loud shriek or a soft murmur. All colors seem garish, blinding, and all tactile input is harsh to the touch. Everything is a blur, without shape, chaotic. I can’t make order out of the chaos. I have nothing to anchor me and my incoherent thoughts. My brain lacks the ability to file information away under recognizable labels.
Without warning, the universe exploded. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t hear. My entire world had become pain. The pain had no orientation—it had no location, no direction, no measure. It defied words. I was pain. Another explosion, and the pain intensified. But now, there was orientation, location: it was in my head, and it was … Read more
I woke up in the middle of the night with a horrific headache. Every motion, however slight, set off a new explosion of pain, taking the headache to another level. Though I knew that chances were that nothing would help, I downed ginger and turmeric caplets. Perhaps it would at least take the edge off. … Read more
“I assume you’ve been having de-stress migraines?” I was surprised for a split second—how would she know? Then I remembered—Sara, a friend, also suffers from frequent horrific migraines. She knew what it was like. On Wednesday, I had to say no Irina’s invitation to go out to dinner. Earlier that day, I wondered whether I … Read more