On the one hand, I keep expecting the other shoe to drop, but on the other, there's that niggling little voice that wonders whether this time I'll get away with it. It's been a week since I left home to come to Israel to visit my family, and though I have suffered several bad headaches that took me a good couple of hours to get under control, I have yet to experience a long-lasting crippling one.
Maybe I've finally figured it out. I have been taking three-hour naps every day--perhaps it's actually doing the trick.
But deep down inside, when I consider the rate at which I've been pacing myself, I know that at some point I'll have to pay a price, a heavy one.
Let's see, when I arrived at Mum and Dad's on Wednesday, we hung out for a while with Rachel and her family—that wasn't bad. What did I do on Thursday? I went out with my sister-in-law, Tuval. But that was brief, wasn't it? I don't think I did anything else. What about Friday? Did we go out to eat? Saturday I went to Rosh HaAyin to a school reunion. That was a biggie—lots of people after a long drive. And I stayed late. I got home around midnight.
On Sunday I walked down to the local shopping center to recharge my SIM card—that didn't take long. In fact it was a pleasant walk. Then I went out with Amir in the evening. On Monday, Mum and I went on a shopping trip, which really drained me. Tuesday morning was nice—a morning walk on the beach with Tuval and the dogs. Though joining Rachel in her pottery class that evening did have me operating on fumes.
Perhaps I should take a day off.
But I still want to see Sigalit, and Yael. And didn't Tuval say something about doing stuff on Friday? Then on the weekend I'll be spending time with my family. Sunday I'm going to Tel Aviv to visit Gidi… I should really contact Avri… And Nahshon also said something about getting together next week, as did Amir.
Here I go, as I always do when I travel, psyching myself in--as long as the bloody brain isn't currently hitting hard, I start believing that I'll get away with it. But I can't really ignore my eight plus years of experience--I know that despite the long naps I'm taking, I will be in trouble. It's a matter of when the other shoe will drop, not if.
Will the bloody brain hit hard sometime during this trip, or will it wait until I get back home? Though maybe, just maybe, this time will be different.